Under the Sea (Part 1).

    I have always wanted to scuba dive.  Once I saw “The Undersea World of Jacques Cousteau” I was lost.  Ariel dreamed of being where the people are, I dreamed of being where the fish are.

from Wikimedia Commons

    I took swimming classes as a child, I didn't do very well in class.  But that didn't stop me I taught myself to swim ... underwater of course.
   It was so quite and peaceful under the water, unless my brothers were around and decided to ride my back to side of the pool.  Then it was still quite but the peace thing was gone.  I was too concerned with getting back to where the people are so I could breath.  Did I mention I am terrified of drowning.
   I tried snorkeling at the beach, but the waves kept sending water down the snorkel.  That would trigger that whole terrified of drowning thing again.
   So I knew I would have to wait until I could learn how to scuba dive.  That way you take the air with you so you can breath.  That would solve that terrified of drowning problem.  Yeah right...
   So after I was out on my own with my own money I signed up for scuba diving classes.  I listened to all the things that could go wrong and how to correct them.  I learned all about the scuba equipment.  I bought a real scuba mask, a real snorkel, and real fins.  Not those cheap things from the pool department at Walmart. I got a dive knife, dive log, compass and a dive bag to put it all in.
   I was so proud of these purchases that walked around the living room trying them out.  And I only tripped on the fins a couple of times.  I never really liked that vase anyway.  I was so excited about our classes first day in the pool in full gear, that I felt like a kid on Christmas Eve.
   The big day dawned bright and sunny.  We got to the store and went straight into the pool room.  Suited up in all the equipment and hopped into the pool.  Now I have to say at this point we were in the shallow end of the pool in about 4 feet of water.  We were to go underwater sit on the bottom and practice purging water from our masks.  Okay great, here we go.
   Down I went, and promptly forgot to breath through my mouth.  I am trying desperately to breath through my nose that is blocked by the mask.  Uh oh, my brain goes into panic mode ... can't breath, no air, going to die on the bottom of the pool.  Then my legs remember I am only in 4 feet of water and I am 5' 8”, and stand up.  I immediately jerk the mask off and come face to face with a classmate who is more terrified than I am.
   This is a good thing.  My teacher mood kicks in.
   I start talking to her and calming her down.  I remind her that we can breath underwater.  We have these freaking heavy tanks full of air on our backs.  I told her to practice breathing with me through the scuba regulator and then we would go down together.  It worked.
She kept her eyes glued to me and we completed that exercise and all the others for the day.  I was so concerned with her I forgot about myself. Jacques Cousteau  would have been proud.

Image via Wikipedia

   After that I had no problem.  Until my friend (???) tried to drown me toward the end of the course.
   But that my friends is another blog.

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Help I don't know what to write about...

   What do write about when you can't think what to write about.  Do you just throw yourself into it and hope for the best.  Or do you give up and hope tomorrow will be better.
  What if its not?  Is this a test of the universe to see if you actually can write under pressure?  Are the blog gods laughing at us?  Showing us they are in control of our writing life, not us.
   Okay, Uncle...Help...SOS....PLEASE.  Give me an idea.  I check all the usual places. The newspapers, other blogs, wiki,  the comics...Hey don't laugh you can get some great ideas there.  Nothing.  Not one little thing comes to mind.
   Now I am getting desperate.  I love keeping this blog up.  It helps me to de-stress.  It is my happy place .... Until I can't think of something to write about.

   Et tu, blogger?  

   Why have you turned on me?  What did I do to you?  I am sorry.  I don't know what for, but I am truly sorry.  Please forgive me.

    Nothing.  I still have no idea what I am going to write about.  I will have a blank screen staring back at me, laughing.  AAGGHHH.

   Wait.  What is this?  There are words on here.  There is a blog post.  Wow, how did that happen?

   THANK YOU,  BLOG GODS.   I will never take you for granted again.


   Wait did I just hear someone laughing!!!!

Image via Wikipedia

                          Dante Alighieri, in Canto II of The Inferno:

                               O Muses, O high genius, aid me now!
                               O memory that engraved the things I saw,
                               Here shall your worth be manifest to all!
                               (Anthony Esolen translation, 2002)






                         







    

My editor....Miss Foxy....

                     I would like you all to meet my Editor.  Miss Foxy. 

                             
                            She is always watching everything I type.
 

   In the mornings, she gets out of bed and leads me to the computer and waits for me to sit down and get started.  If I take too long she will come and get me.
   She is a slave driver.  I am not allowed to leave the computer for long than 5 minutes or she starts yelling loudly for me to get back to work. 
   While helping me work on the blog on Dogs the other day, she feel asleep.  I published it before she okay-ed the pictures and the final copy.
   Believe me she was not happy when she looked on line and found out that not only did I not give her editorial credit, I did not include her picture.  She is still giving me the cold shoulder.
    You have never really been snubbed until you have been snubbed by a dog.  They follow you around and sit right in front of your feet with their back turned to remind you just how wrong you are.  I was tired of tripping over her, so I gave in.
   To make up for that faux pas I had to promise her her own blog with pictures.  Hopefully I will be forgiven soon.

                  She takes her job seriously.... She even edits my dreams.




Edited by Miss Foxy....okay, am I forgiven yet!!!!

Dogs are NOT people... their better than that...

   I am a dog person... no I am a animal person.  We just have dogs right now,  because our dogs are not cat friendly.  All of the dogs we have had we found or I should say they found us.
   I have only had three purebred dogs that I know of in my life.  None of which I paid for from a breeder.   The first was a poodle named Coco that my family got from an Aunt and Uncle who were moving and couldn't take him with them.  The second one was a white shepherd named Polo that I got when I got my first home.  The couple who owned his mom and dad where not going to bred them when ... surprise, they were a little too late getting the male fixed.  And now we have Foxy a Pomeranian.   I first saw her from my office running along a feeder street of a busy freeway.  When I left the building she was trying her best to get past the security guard and into the building.  She was scared and wouldn't go to anyone.  I had just bought some dog food so I got a small bowl and put it down for her.  She ate it then sat on my foot and refused to leave me.  She followed me to my car and jumped in before I could say anything.  So even though we already had 5 dogs, Foxy moved onto the farm.  You give her 5 minutes and she will have any man wrapped around her little paw.  I have seen her do it over and over again.  The little hussy.
   I have lived with numerous dogs through out my life.  I can tell you one thing for sure, purebred or mutt every dog I have meet is more honest, loyal and loving than most people.  They worry about us when we don't feel good.  They are always there to greet us when we get home.  The love us even when we don't seem to deserve it, like the times we get mad over something and blame them.  They protect us from harm without thought to themselves, even when we don't want them too.  They know better than we do just ask them.  And yes they can communicate if you learn to listen and read them.
   Some people just don't get it.  They will tell you dogs can't dream.  So have they ever even seen a dog sleeping.  I guess the wagging tale, running feet, muffled barks and whines are gas right.  They say dogs can't smile.  Wrong, I have seen my dogs and others change expressions when someone they like enters the room.  They say dogs don't have feeling like we do, okay maybe on this one they are right a dog's feelings go deeper.  You will never feel more loved, excepted and protected like you will with a dog.
   Then there are the people who will tell you a dog is dangerous.  A dog will fight when cornered, yes.  But then all living things will do that, even some plants.  I have yet to see a whole breed of dog no matter what, that is all bad.  Every generation has their so called mean breads.  You know the ones that will turn on their owners.  First I heard it was German Shepherds, then Doberman Pinschers, then Chow Chows, then Rottweilers, and now its Pit Bulls.  Yes, there are some bad dogs, I'm not naïve.  But most of them are made that way by being mistreated, or in breed for aggressiveness.  In other words made that way by people, not nature.  The in breeding part does the same thing with people, look at the history of some of this worlds royal and high society families.
   So next time you come across one of those people, you know the ones who look down their noses and inform you that a dog is an animal not a person.  Look them straight in the eye and tell them your right they would never lower themselves to be a person.  They are better than that.

This is our boy Chance...We miss you...

A dog or cat is the only time you can ever really buy love.  Check out your local pet adoption agency or pound and find your own special little lover.
Don't know where to look click here.

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Could you hold please...Do I really have a choice ...

   Have you ever got one of these calls.  The phone rings you answerer it only to here a mechanical voice say,  “Please stay on the line for an important phone call.  We will be with you shortly.”
   Companies are now calling you up to put you on hold.  It is bad enough when you call them and you get “Thank you for calling.  Please hold.”  If your lucky you just heard an actual human voice tell you that.  It is probably the last human voice you will hear for quite awhile.  Unless you are calling to buy something, then they answer real quick.
   When you are on hold you listen to muzak or a recorded infomercial  for the company.  Then they tease you by taking you off hold only to hear the mechanical voice tell you “Your call is very important to us.  Please continue to hold.” and back on hold you go.  If my call was that important to them they would not have put me on hold in the first place.
   Then there are the ones that threaten you.  They have you on hold take you off long enough to say, “Please continue to hold.  If you hang up you will lose your place.  ALL calls are handled in the order they are received.”  You feel like a kid who is caught misbehaving by the teacher and is sent to the end of the line.
   But I guess that is better than calling someone only to hear this, “All lines are currently busy.  Please hang up and try your call later.”   Click.  Why say please hang up when they are going to hang up on you.  Maybe it so they have the excuses we said please.   This type of call doesn't even hold out a prayer of ever being answered.  You didn't win the lottery.  Better luck next time.  See ya.
   The more important your call is the ruder the hold response is.  These are usually utility companies or government agencies.  They know they have you over a barrel.  They know there is no one else you can call for your problem.  Can you say monopoly. 
   I get so mad with being put on hold.  My time is just as valuable as theirs is.  More so to me because it is mine.   They seem to enjoy stealing your time from you.  Now they don't even wait for you to call to steal it.  They call you. 
   Well in this case I am in charge not them.  You want to talk to me be there when I pick up.  Other wise I send you to back of the line and you will have to wait your turn. 
   All human calls are answered in the order the are received.  Computers calls are happily sent to the twilight zone of the disconnected.  Good luck getting  a hold of a human there.

Please Hold...

Maybe these companies need to make this mandatory reading.