Would you want to be a mermaid ...
Or a whale....
Recently, in a large city in Australia ,
a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in
the window of a gym.
It said, "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"
A middle-aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not
match those of the woman on the poster,
responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.
To Whom It May Concern,
Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins,
sea lions, curious humans.)
They have an active sex life,
get pregnant and have adorable baby whales.
They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing
themselves with shrimp.
They play and swim in the seas,
seeing wonderful places like Patagonia ,
the Bering Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia .
Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs.
They are incredible creatures
and virtually have no predators
other than humans.
They are loved, protected and admired
by almost everyone in the world.
Mermaids don't exist.
If they did exist,
they would be lining up outside the offices
of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity
crisis. Fish or human?
They don't have a sex life
because they kill men who get close to them,
not to mention how could they have sex?
Just look at them ... where is IT?
Therefore, they don't have kids either.
Not to mention,
who wants to get close to a girl who smells
like a fish store?
The choice is perfectly clear to me:
I want to be a whale.
P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads
the idea that only skinny people are beautiful,
but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids,
a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver,
and a piece of chocolate with my friends.
With time, we gain weight
because we accumulate so much information and wisdom
in our heads that when there is no more room,
it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren't heavy,
we are enormously cultured,
educated and happy.
Beginning today,
when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think,
¨Good grief, look how smart I am!¨
Image via Wikipedia |
When was the last time you saw a mermaid leap for joy??? |
She makes a good argument, but she had me at chocolate and ice cream. Let's see you get to travel, see exotic places and marine life. Have lots of friends and not have to worry about your diet....
I want to be a whale. How about you?
12 comments:
Yay! for whales! ¨Good grief, look how smart I am!¨
Best line ever. Thanks for this amazing post.
I love this post! Puts things into perspective for sure!
CBG
canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com
Fantastic post.
And whales like me have a much better chance of climbing into mountain paradises in Tasmania than any fish foot!
I too would like to be a whale...but I fall into the mermaid category, making myself unhappy with my own diet constraints most of the time.
Sad, but true.
I like it here, and I will be back! :)
GO WHALES!
Yah, I always wondered how mermaids did it..
Oh! Now I have the correct definition for smartass...
:D
Rhonda, I am getting smarter everyday.
CBG, It certainly does doesn't it.
Al,All that flopping and falling takes to long to climb. So I'm with you on that one.
Jamie, You are welcome anytime.
Cathy, You and me both.
Laura, I always wondered about that one myself.
Here's to whales everywhere! Great post with a very good message.
Yay, whales. What a wonderful post! (I wonder if some men work out, check their abs and go looking for mermaids, what doesn't exist?)
Definitely a darn clever argument. I'm going with the whales.
Lee
Tossing It Out
Sandy and Kittie, I with you go whales.
Lee, she makes a great argument doesn't she. I would rather be a whale too.
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